(Version 1.2)
By existing in the presence of Yaseen, you automatically agree to these terms.
Fact 0. Everyone is either a future Yaseen or a Yaseen
Rule 1. You cannot exit the Yaseen. There is no door. Stop looking.
Rule 2. You cannot win 3,041 times in UNO or you will be smitten by a reverse card from the heavens.
Rule 3. Bathing is prohibited on the 4th of July; fireworks and soap do not mix.
Rule 4. Your birthday is now officially property of the Yaseen.
4.12 Any pet that is even slightly damp at any point becomes Yaseen’s. This includes fish, axolotls, moist turtles, and emotional-support sponges.
Rule 5. Yaseen owns all spoons within a 5km radius of his current location.
Rule 6. Anyone caught eating cereal with a fork will be awarded honorary Yaseen citizenship.
Rule 7. If you hear the word “yeet” after midnight, you must respond “yote” or pay a fine of one (1) chicken nugget.
Rule 8. All socks worn on Thursdays must be mismatched in honor of Yaseen’s left foot.
Rule 9. No one may sneeze more than 8 times in a row unless in the presence of a trained sneeze supervisor.
Rule 10. Yaseen reserves the right to photobomb all your family pictures.
Rule 11. You must laugh at Yaseen’s jokes, even if they are not funny (they are most of the time funny).
Rule 12. All bananas are to be peeled upside down.
Rule 13. Pineapple on pizza is legal, but only if approved by Yaseen’s council of taste.
Rule 14. You cannot own more than 3 rubber ducks unless licensed by Yaseen himself.
Rule 15. All Monopoly games must end when Yaseen says “”
Rule 16. Under no circumstances may you look Yaseen in the eye while eating spaghetti.
Rule 17. Owning a hat shaped like a duck grants you free passage in Yaseen territory.
Rule 18. The word “moist” is banned except during formal poetry readings.
Rule 19. Any cat that blinks at Yaseen is now his, regardless of your feelings on the matter.
Rule 20. Clapping must be done in odd numbers.
Rule 21. On leap years, you must greet Yaseen with a nat 20 roll if not you need to look at rule 67.
Rule 22. If your shoelaces are untied, you owe Yaseen a fun fact about potatoes.
Rule 23. All cheese must be cut diagonally.
Rule 24. If you see Yaseen in public, you must pretend you are long-lost cousins.
Rule 25. Any photograph of Yaseen automatically becomes the property of the “International Museum of Meme Law.”
Rule 26. Sandwiches eaten after 9pm require a permit.
Rule 27. Under subsection 27.1, peanut butter must be chunky on Fridays.
Rule 28. Crying over spilt milk is mandatory.
Rule 29. Any game of chess played in Yaseen’s presence must use only pawns.
Rule 30. Saying “bruh” more than 20 times in an hour will summon Yaseen’s approval nod.
Rule 31. Kinder is an honorary member of Yaseen’s council.
Rule 32. Any voice call without at least 5 yaseens in it may need an imidiate call to call all Yaseens to HQ.
Rule 33. Socks are considered shoes on Tuesdays.
Rule 34. Yaseen decides when winter ends.
Rule 35. All ice cream must be served with a pickle garnish.
Rule 36. Any argument can be won by shouting “because Yaseen said so.”
Rule 37. Under no circumstances may you eat spaghetti without permission from the Pasta Department.
Rule 38. If you find a rubber chicken, you must immediately deliver it to Yaseen HQ.
Rule 39. Pizza slices must be eaten starting from the crust.
Rule 40. Yaseen may claim ownership of any left shoe.
Rule 41. Rule 1 may be dropped for exactly 2.73 seconds if Rule 56 is broken under a waxing crescent moon.
Rule 42. You must address any goose as “duck”
Rule 43. Cows are not allowed to participate in karaoke without prior approval.
Rule 44. The phrase “it’s just a prank” is legally banned.
Rule 45. Any photo of bread must be blessed by Yaseen before being posted online.
Rule 46. Goldfish crackers are considered currency.
Rule 47. If you spill tea, you must tell Yaseen the gossip.
Rule 48. Tacos may only be eaten while wearing socks on your hands.
Rule 49. Frogs are Yaseen’s official messengers.
Rule 50. You cannot whistle “Baby Shark” within 50 meters of Yaseen.
Rule 51. Yaseen51
Rule 52. Under rule 52.1, dad jokes are encouraged but punished.
Rule 53. No one may run faster than Yaseen’s pet snail (officially recognized as the Minister of Speed).
Rule 54. All rainbows belong to Yaseen.
Rule 55. Yaseen has the right to call dibs on anything except for the number 3 and that goat in Maxcio.
Rule 56. Shoes must be worn on the wrong feet every third Sunday of a leap year unless it's an even number.
Rule 57. The number 7 is banned unless written in glitter.
Rule 58. All name tags cooler than Yaseen's must be destroyed.
Rule 59. You may not wink at an avocado.
Rule 60. Ice cubes must be hexagonal by law.
Rule 61. Yaseen is the sole owner of all clouds shaped like animals.
Rule 62. Rule 81 must be not answered.
Rule 63. If you wrote a code you must save it as .yas extension
Rule 64. Spaghetti is considered a unit of measurement.
Rule 65. Owning 5 infinity stones grants you three (3) wishes from Yaseen.
Rule 66. If you spill salt, you must throw it over Yaseen’s left shoulder.
Rule 67. If you didn't roll a nat 20 you will be punished to play BSS without a macro for 85 days.
Rule 68. Unicorn sightings must be reported within 24 hours.
Rule 69. Nice.
Rule 70. Buttering toast after 9 clock in yaseen timezone is illegal.
Rule 71. All chairs are to be referred to as “sitting devices.”
Rule 72. Yaseen calls dibs on disco tile.
Rule 73. You may not harm a fellow yaseen in anyway unless it's funny and agreed by 3 other yaseen's.
Rule 74. Yaseen reserves the right that any rule in this TOS might be changed at any point
Rule 75. Rule 76 is only applied if you had failed in the nat 20 or it's a third leap year from current yaseen timezone.
Rule 76. On Wednesdays, you must speak only in riddles.
Rule 77. If you hear “free pizza,” you must investigate.
Rule 78. The moon is Yaseen’s personal flashlight.
Rule 79. Whipped cream must be applied in spirals.
Rule 80. If your hair gets static electricity, you owe Yaseen three compliments.
Rule 81. How to get stems.
Rule 82. You cannot blink more than 15 times per minute in Yaseen’s presence.
Rule 83. Yaseen may call rigged on anything that doesn't go his way.
Rule 84. In case of confusion, ask the wiki.
Rule 85. You may not speak ill of potatoes.
Rule 86. If you find a penny, you must give it to Yaseen.
Rule 87. Don’t question the duck in the corner.
Rule 88. Any mod may join the Yaseen's but cannot exit.
Rule 89. Yaseen has the rights to any sentence he said without applying copyright to it.
Rule 90. All digital clocks must be changed to Yaseen timezone.
Rule 91. Yaseen’s opinion is now your opinion.
Rule 92. Sporks are the official utensil of the Yaseen Nation.
Rule 93. All watermelons must be named before consumption (names must be approved by Yaseen).
Rule 94. You cannot whisper the word “bees” without summoning three of them.
Rule 95. Rain must be applauded in unison under Yaseen’s conducting.
Rule 96. Under rule 96.1, all hedgehogs are undercover agents for Yaseen.
Rule 97. Crayons are to be stored in alphabetical color order.
Rule 98. You may not exit the group chat without a 6-month notice.
Rule 99. All disputes will be settled by a dance-off.
Rule 100. Rule 1 applies twice.